You Go, Hippie Homegirl!!!
No press is bad press, but this writing made me throw up in my mouth like Oxy-C at Coachella:
Portland is America's rockingest city, and it's rockingest inhabitant is hippie homegirl Honey Owens. Proprietor of Rad Summer, the city's coolest shop, her band Valet make the freshest, most mind-altering cosmic desert jams going. Honey is also in Atlas Sound and goes out with Adam "White Rainbow" Forkner, completing an all-powerful holy trinity of Pacific Northwest hypno-rcok. SR
(editor's note — fuck you, "SR")
Meanwhile, Valet did totally rock recently at MHoW, where there at least, I got to see Homegirl play topless and I didn't have to read anything.